God? Or Gateway to God?
Religion began when Ogg, the caveman, ate one of those pretty red mushrooms with the white flakes all over it—and saw OOGA—enormous and terrifying! OOGA said “I am OOGA, Greatest and Most Powerful, and I make things happen. If you worship me, I will make good things happen. If you do not worship me I will make bad things happen.”
When he woke up, Ogg was convinced that OOGA had chosen him to enlighten his fellow cavemen, so he proclaimed himself the Supreme Seer of the Tribe, he-who-talked-with-Ooga (who made things happen,) and told his fellow cavemen “Give me food and lodging so that I do not have to work for a living, call me “Super Seer” kiss my ass at every opportunity, and seek my guidance on every little part of your life. If you do this, Ooga will bless you. If you do not do this, Ooga will curse you, and every bad thing that happens will be because Ooga hates you. Anything good that happens means that Ooga forgives you. Got that? Good. Bring me a fatted calf, barbecued to perfection, and maybe a few clamshells as an ‘offering’. I’ll put in a good word for you to Ooga, next time we chat.”
Religion of one sort or another has been part of human life since very close to the beginning. Homo sapiens are born with an instinct to figure things out. Why does it rain? Why are there seasons? What are those things in the sky? Working, fighting, and competing for food, most humans don’t have time to figure it out and will welcome someone who seems to know what he’s talking about.
If you’ve never had a “psychedelic experience” whether through LSD, Mescaline, Peyote, psilocybin, and even those very dangerous “Elf Caps,” Amanita Muscaria, you will never fully comprehend the seeming uber-reality of those experiences.
Other means of psychedelic access are prayer and meditation
I painted this portrait of “Elf,” a Gay Street Artist in San Francisco, 1972. I had already had 3 psychedelic experiences, although not via the Elf Cap, but LSD and Psilocybin--and Cannabis, lest I forget the flower that “gets you high.” In the picture I took this from, he was reaching into a baggie filled with buds. (I am tempted to believe “The Burning Bush” of Biblical fame was actually marijuana.)
In the Old Days, before “science” started inspecting beliefs and changing them. We believed that the Sun was a god in a fiery chariot who drove across Heaven every day. For unknown thousands of years, humans worshiped their own versions of the Sun God, who made things happen the way they did. The seasons were the work of God. God meant there to be Winter so we could appreciate Summer, which God made so we could grow our food before Winter came again. If floods came, or hurricanes, it was God’s will—which meant even more fatted calves for the High Priests. Famines meant that God was angry with the Tribe and the Priests would see what they could do to calm him down.
High Priests are well named. In the beginning, they got “high” on one psychedelic plant or another, and truly believed they had seen and talked with God. There are various other mushrooms with the ability to access God. Jesus had Shewbread. Joseph Smith had a Giant Toad and Epilepsy. St. Paul had Epilepsy. Many Old Testament Prophets had Epilepsy. Those who didn’t, ate Shewbread for their visions.
Epilepsy causes Grand Mal Seizures, and is well-documented for causing encounters with God or Jesus or one or more Angels. It has been known for millennia as “The Falling Down Sickness.” When an epileptic has a seizure, he or she crumbles to the ground and writhes around in apparent agony, but somewhere, in some never-never land no one else can see, the epileptic is walking and talking with God in Paradise.
Giant toads, and surely many other animals, secrete a poison from glands on their backs whenever they are threatened. Even if it didn’t kill whatever was threatening the toad, it scared the hell out of them. It sent them to the same place that Epileptic Seizures and LSD and Magic Toadstools, peyote, mescaline, marijuana, and all the rest of those Keys to the Kingdom of Heaven. Like Jesus said “The Priests and the Pharisees have hidden the keys to the kingdom; they are like dogs sleeping in a manger who neither eat nor allow the cattle to eat.”
Jesus knew what he was talking about because he had discovered “Shewbread.” “Vision Bread.” “Legal for the Priests alone.”One little piece of a loaf would get you “into the spirit.” That’s what he passed out on the Mount before he preached the beatitudes; he got his followers high on LSD; no wonder they thought he was magic; no wonder they thought he glowed. Acid Trippers report seeing people’s auras.
“Christian ‘Sacrament’ began as Shewbread and wine—for which Mormons have substituted Wonder Bread and bottled water.” Gabriel Horny
Long before Jesus’ time, there was an Ecclesiastical Law recorded in Leviticus, which forbade harvesting the corners of fields of grain. It also forbade picking up those heads of grain left in the fields by the harvesters. Those were gathered by the High Priests “for the benefit of Widows and Orphans.” That grain was surely rye, and heads of rye, when left in the field until after the first rain of the season, sported a dusting of red powder—considered a blessing from Jehovah. When those grains were ground into flour and baked into bread, they gave the High Priests visions. They believed it was Godly bread and the punishment was death for any priest, or baker, to tell the secret of “Shewbread,” “show-bread” or “vision bread.” Early Judaism was based on LSD! So was Christianity!
Matthew tells the story of Jesus & the gang, out in the fields gathering the grain that had been left behind by harvesters. I don’t think they were eating them, right there; that was an interpretation added later by a scribe who didn’t understand Shewbread. Eating it raw like that could easily kill them with what later became known as “St. John’s fire.” They were gathering the grain to make bread for Passover Supper. That was what was in the bread he passed out to his disciples on what became the Last Supper.
When the High Priests came flapping out to the fields to scold Jesus for breaking the Sabbath, Jesus responded: “Have you not read about King David, when he was hungry, and those with him were hungry, and they did go into the Temple and eat the Shewbread which was legal for the priests alone. Therefore I say that Sabbath was made for man, not man for Sabbath, therefore the Son of Man is Master of the Sabbath.” It didn’t make sense until I understood what that episode was all about. The priests were pissed because Jesus was gathering their source of inspiration! He knew their Holy little secret. That very well might have played a part in the Jewish decision to let the Romans crucify him. Jesus and the apostles were stoned on LSD, and drunk on wine, and were all up in the garden of Gethsemane, “in the spirit,” when the Romans showed up and caught Jesus and Judas “kissing.” The rest is history—or sort of. It is quite likely that Mary Magdalene was also high on Shewbread as she waited for his resurrection on the third day. She saw what she wanted to see, and Christendom is based on that “vision.”
Joseph Smith saw what he wanted to see when he had his visions—caused either by Epilepsy or Giant Toads or both. His father’s descriptions of Joseph’s visions perfectly describe epileptic seizures. But Joseph’s memoirs or biographers also deliberately mentioned the “Giant Toad” which knocked him down three times before he could recover the Golden Plates that comprised the Book of Mormon. My best guess is that he let his followers fondle his Giant Toad before he put on the Urim and Thumman and translated the BM. Smith was bright, a good writer, with a fantastic imagination. He truly believed that he was doing God’s will by making up the B of M, basing it on a book called The Hebrews.
It is also quite possible that Joseph Smith was a closeted homosexual. Polygamy might have been his defense against being Queer.
If my theory is true, that loving Jesus makes you queer, and my experience has assurred me that it is, then it is reasonable to assume that Joseph, whose search for the Real Jesus was the cause for his rejecting all other religions and establishing his own, with the teachings of Jesus as the core of his embroidered Gospel. Joe made Jesus more accessible by encouraging Mormons to read their Bibles. Most religions forbade their followers to read the Bible, but to rely on the interpretation of their Pastors or Preachers. Joe encouraged people to read for themselves. But that had a totally unexpected result. Joe had already programmed himself as a Jesus-clone & that makes it likely that Joe, born today, woud be Gay. But in his day, sodomites were as illegal and abominable as they had been for thousands of years, so he probably fought it—like I did, getting married twice to try to prove I wasn’t an abomination. In the process I made two women very unhappy and angry with me. And it didn’t “help” me at all.
The mistake Joseph made was the same one as the original Christian Fathers. To insist that Jesus is Christ, they had to tack Judaism onto Christianity; they had to include the Old Testament to explain who Christ was, or was supposed to be. “Jesus tried to take away ‘sin’; Peter & Paul put it back again.” GH
My theory is that “The Gospel of Jesus,” recorded and explained and expanded by thousands of “Editors” throughout history, nonetheless causes homosexuality. If you Really really believe in Jesus, then you really, really want to love other men and the only way you can do that is to stop being religious. Which are the chief homophobic religions? Christianity, Judaism & Islam. Christians and Jews and Muslims all condemn it—while their priests and prophets all practice it in sinful secret. We claim we could not help ourselves, loving other men, and it is true. This is why priests can’t keep their hands off altar boys.
Here’s the scary part: Joseph’s new religion worked. It produced us. Religion is like bullshit, by itself nothing happens, but sprinkle it with seeds of truth, and flowers start to grow! Mormonism is the bullshit I grew out of. Catholics, Baptists, Adventists, all have their own fertilizer, and the seeds are those Jesus scattered 2000 years ago. He said to Peter “On this rock I will build my Church, and the Gates of Hell shall not prevail against it.” And sure enough, here we are, twenty centuries later, still arguing about the true meanings of the sayings of Jesus.
When Jesus first appeared in Palestine, he didn’t bring with him a scribe to write down what he said. Most Jews were illiterate in those days; only the Priests knew how to read and write. It may have started during his 3 year ‘ministry,’ someone may have said “Let me write this down, this is good stuff.” I doubt it, but it could have happened. Years after Jesus died, “teaching scrolls” were created for all of the Apostles and Disciples who were spreading “The Gospel of Jesus” – not necessarily “Jesus Christ.”
These “teaching scrolls” were the predecessor of “talking points,” now projected on teleprompters.
One such teaching scroll was found in the caves of Nag near the Dead Sea, and when translated became “The Gospel According to Thomas.” It caught my attention in 1970 when a sign in a Gay Bookstore window called it “THE GAY GOSPEL!”
Reading that teaching scroll changed my life. It allowed me to understand many of the questions that were unanswered by traditional Christianity.
It begins by saying “Whoever discovers the true meaning of these words will not taste death.” Wow! It goes on to say “Whoever seeks should not cease seeking until he finds; when he finds he will be troubled; when he is troubled he will marvel, and then he will reign over The All.” And it ends with an admonition to Peter that women are just as good as men if they follow him. “I will take her and guide her so that her spirit becomes male, like you males, and I tell you: Every female who makes herself male shall enter The Kingdom of Heaven.” How much does that sound like Lesbians?
Many of the verses in between clarify those we’ve been confused by in the Christian Bible. Jesus was advocating a way of life, not a religion promising life-after-death. Thomas quotes him as saying “If your leaders tell you that Heaven is above the clouds, then the birds have beat you to it; if they say it is in the Sea, then the fish have beat you there. But I tell you, The Kingdom of Heaven is inside you and outside you, and is spread across the land but men do not see it. What you are waiting for has already happened, but you know it not.” Jesus certainly wasn’t promoting Judaism when he said of circumcision, when asked if it was “beneficial.” “If it were a good thing, then the father would beget them circumcised in the mother.” He also said “You have heard it said ‘an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth’ but I tell you love each other and forgive each other and turn the other cheek and go the extra mile, but don’t judge or you’ll be judged.” That was Anti-Judaism, folks!
But when Peter and Mary announced that Jesus had risen from the dead after the promised 3 days, and had then gone up into Heaven, it was assumed to he had validated all those Jewish laws and customs and prophesies, and instead tacked the Old Testament onto The New Testament, invalidating both!eHHh h